I usually don't put money problems out there. I usually don't put my most inner thoughts out there. I learned long ago in a abusive relationship to not show your fears. Well he knows my fears and now has decided to screw with me. How you might ask? Well he has decided not to pay child support. He said I was just using our child to get paid.
Funny thing is I paid child support for 15 years. I keep doing what I am expected to do. I obey the law. I try and treat people the way I want to be treated, with the exception of those who have treated me like shit. I try and be the best I can be with everyone.
So now this man who put us through hell already is doing it again. I had no choice but to be here because of all the other circumstances in my life. If I had known I wasn't going to receive the money owed to me I wouldn't have gone out this last weekend. I wouldn't have had my nails done ( for the third time in my life ) nor would I have bought the cigarettes I started smoking again.
So now I feel a bit selfish and greedy cause I went and did but don't have money to buy milk, bread, or cereal for my kids.
This is the first time in a long time I have had this problem. I usually have a back up plan but due to my new bills and the cut of my main resource we are in a hard place.
I have already sucked up my pride and asked my parents for help due to us being thrown out. I don't want to suck it up farther and beg. I was talking to a co worker about it and she said something about food stamps. Well I don't get those! The only assistance I get is for my daughters disability an it covers her medical and money to get her to appointments and a few things she wants. And that has been cut!
Not sure what to do! All I know is that God has never let us down before.
So I wait for a miracle!
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